![]() It also distracts us from the strong likelihood that Ted Cruz is the Zodiac killer. He is loathed by his peers, by the press, by random people he shares elevators with, by spokesmen for Satanic temples, and if a tipsy no-longer-giving-a-damn John Boehner is going to give us as juicy a hook as calling Ted Cruz the devil himself then it's impossible to resist jumping aboard and riding that train for as many stops as it'll let us. One, the political need to still have something to say about Ted Cruz for just a wee bit longer, until he finally gets his ass handed to him in the final states and can go the hell from whence he came, meaning the floor of the Senate.Īnd two, let's face it: Everybody loves dumping on Ted Cruz. He'd certainly at least be able to wrangle a few more committee assignments.Īs for this momentary spurt of stories pretending to take the Ted Cruz-Lucifer connection seriously for the sake o' a quick lark, I suspect we can chalk it up to two things. More to the point, if Ted Cruz were the devil himself I think he'd be doing a lot better in the deep south. This is all supremely silly, of course, although when you're a man running for president against a beet-colored human with a taste for ostentatious wealth, women as bathing-suit-wearing meat prizes, and a permanent sneer glued to his face and you are the one people are comparing to Satan you probably need to think about where you've gone wrong in life. The spokesman then proceeded to dump all over Ted Cruz, because nobody likes Ted Cruz. politics is much worse than you can imagine.” Here's one interviewing a bonafide Satanist to ask the question: Could it be true? Could Ted Cruz really be Satan? “I don’t think Boehner is necessarily saying that he actually thinks Cruz is a Satanist because I just don’t think he is thinking that hard about the issues,” Greaves added. I've seen one running down the various theories of what Lucifer has been thought to look like, over history, and another that interviewed an exorcist as to what exactly could be done about it, if Ted Cruz was possessed by Lucifer, and so forth. WCPO has reached out to the staff of the Stanford Daily for comment.There have been whole array of these in the press. Read the full story from the paper, here. Because apparently, Boehner doesn't make deals with the Devil. > Boehner called Donald Trump one of his “texting buddies.” Boehner voted for Kasich in the Ohio Republican presidential primary, but said he'd vote for Trump if he becomes the Republican nominee. “Don’t be shocked.if two weeks before the convention, here comes Joe Biden parachuting in and Barack Obama fanning the flames to make it all happen,” Boehner said. He recovered when he said he had known Clinton for 25 years and finds her to be very accomplished and smart.īoehner also speculated about surprises that could come closer to the Democratic National Convention if Hillary Clinton’s emails became a larger scandal. > Boehner impersonated Clinton, saying “Oh I’m a woman, vote for me" and received a negative crowd reaction. "But he’s still my friend, and I love him." “ requires more effort on my behalf than all my other friends," Boehner said. > He called presidential hopeful and Ohio Governor John Kasich needy. "I get along with almost everyone, but I have never worked with a more miserable son of a bitch in my life.” “I have Democrat friends and Republican friends," Boehner said. > Boehner called Republican presidential hopeful Ted Cruz "Lucifer in the flesh." Here's what else the student newspaper claims Boehner said at the public event: If only that was the most outlandish thing the West Chester native told the audience. He also told audience members at the talk, hosted by the Stanford Speakers Bureau, they could call him "beaner" and "jackass." Cruz earned a comparison to the devil by former Speaker of the House of Representatives John Boehner (R-Ohio), in an April 12 appearance on A Late Show with Stephen Colbert. “You can call me boner," Boehner said as he took the stage at Stanford University's CEMEX Auditorium on Wednesday evening, according to the university's student newspaper, The Stanford Daily. John has been married to Debbie since 1973 and they are parents to two daughters - Lindsay and Tricia. Lucifer in the flesh, Boehner said during a talk hosted by Stanford University in Palo Alto, Calif., according to the Stanford Daily. (Photo: Yuri Gripas/Reuters/File) Former House Speaker John Boehner offered a rather blunt assessment of Texas Sen. It's the word many unfamiliar with the former Speaker of the House have mistakenly said when trying to pronounce his name. John Boehner likened Ted Cruz to the devil on Wednesday.
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